Euro 24, Spalletti’s Azzurri Sovereignty crashes with Spain

DEAR AZZURRI, LET’S KEEP HURTING OURSELVES

Dear Azzurri, “let’s keep going like this, let’s hurt ourselves…” (Nanni Moretti).

Excuse me, dear Azzurri, should we start with the “control of the game”? Let’s forget it, the Spaniards always had it, we didn’t touch it at all. The control.

Should we start, dear Azzurri, with Calafiori? Let’s forget it, because it’s harsh to pick on someone who scores an own goal. And yet, damn it. That wasn’t just an own goal, it was sadism.

Should we start with the fact that Sacchi at the ’96 Euros changed five players for the second match against the Czech Republic, and Spalletti at the 2024 Euros against Spain didn’t change a single one? Let’s forget it, some coaches always have to surprise us by doing the exact opposite of what a normal person would do.

Should we start with Barella being like Tardelli? Let’s forget that too…

Should we start with the rhetoric that overflowed from the TVs, flooding our living rooms after a 2-1 against Albania? Let’s forget it.

Should we start with those who said: if we beat Spain, we are first? Let’s forget it. Here we are at the peak of Azzurri nationalism, and that’s it.

AND THE AZZURRI EVEN THANK DONNARUMMA

The paradox is that in the end, the Azzurri thank Donnarumma for preventing a worse outcome. The only bright spot in a dreadful list of ratings of 3s and 4s, starting with Di Lorenzo and Dimarco, passing through Calafiori and Jorginho, and ending with Chiesa and Scamacca. The striker who was supposed to pull us out of the goal drought that’s been gripping us. Not even half a shot on target. Oh well… For the names not mentioned, let’s give them an average of 3.5 and be done with it.

Hooray, without Donnarumma, the result would have been even more embarrassing. Now, faced with a national team that stayed holed up in their training camp in Iserlohn (having already shut themselves in before the end of the match against Albania), we all remain there, puzzled and hanging in the void. Clinging to the match against Croatia. With that Big Who Knows (“Il Grande Boh”, Jovanotti) that we’ve been carrying around since the training camp in Coverciano and even from Mancini’s national team.

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ITALIAN VERSION

Che botta contro la Spagna. Il sovranismo azzurro di Spalletti va a sbattere a Gelsenkirchen

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Azzurri knocked out, Riccardo Calafiori caused the own goal that caused Italy's defeat against Spain, in the second match of the 2024 European Football Championships in Germany

Riccardo Calafiori after causing the own goal of the Azzurri’s defeat against Spain

TIKI-TAKA, GEGENPRESSING, AND SPALLETTI’S AZZURRI NATIONALISTS

For those Azzurri who play the part of the eternal optimists: all things considered, we only conceded one, and it was an own goal. The Spain that few paid attention to on the eve now matches the Germany that no one saw coming. Dust off the handbooks on Tiki-Taka and Gegenpressing, which still hold up better than Spalletti‘s somewhat smug and presumptuous style – that constant lecturing us on football from within a maze of words – which clumsily crashed in Gelsenkirchen.

I won’t dwell on the catenaccio and counterattack (catenaccio & contropiede) that might have saved us, and maybe not, but a little tweak to the defense, which was much talked about before Spalletti formed the Nationalist Azzurri party – a winning team doesn’t get touched… – wouldn’t have been sacrilege. And since Calafiori would have been the one to pay the price, therefore…

Fortunately, the Azzurri at least played in the cool of the Rhineland. We didn’t even get that, we’re like leaves on trees in June, which is to say, bad, in this hellish heat of Minos.

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LEGGI ANCHE

TUTTO IL CALCIO DI GERMANIA 2024

CARO DIARIO AZZURRO, L’ITALIA GIORNO PER GIORNO

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